The Guilt of Messing Up as A Parent

Warning: What some may consider graphic images near the end of the post.

My original intention had been to post Emergency (part 4), but today has been a very long and exhausting day, so it will just have to wait.

Yesterday evening, my husband, kids, and I went over to a friends house for a birthday cookout. There was a handful of adults, my two children, and one other.

We were all moving back and forth between outside and the house, and not paying as much attention to the children as we should have been.

All three of the children had been warned to stay away from the grill, because it was hot, but they’re all under five, and the youngest, my son, is barely two.

The children get oddly quiet, so my husband goes searching, and as he comes around the corner of the house, my son touches the side of the grill. It takes him a moment to register the pain and start crying.

Last night, his hand was pink, but did not seem to bad, but my instincts were saying it was worse than it looked. The others talked me down, telling my he would be okay, that it would teach him not to touch anything hot, that he would learn to listen.

Well, I’ll tell you what, a second degree burn is not a lesson. It’s just painful.

Today it blistered up, taking up part of his left hand, along his ring finger and his pinkie finger. I called my husband and made him leave work early, so he could stay home with our daughter. I took our son to Urgent Care.

They told me, all things considered, it didn’t look that bad, and to keep it clean, and keep an eye on it, to make sure he doesn’t develop an infection.

I have all day feeling just terrible, positively wracked with guilt, because I usually stay right with him. I know how adventurous and stubborn he is, and the one time I give him a bit more freedom, he hurts himself.

Please tell me I’m not alone. I feel like shit. My baby got hurt, because I messed up.

 

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